Prison

I spent last evening at a local prison called traffic school and had quite an interesting time! Upon entering the 20 year old hotel-turned-traffic school building, I noticed that the air was warm and smelly and that there were way too many people in line than should have had to stay in such close quarters for so long. We began at 4:30 and were't supposed to end until 9:30. The instructor was about 70 and on a major power trip, but he had to be because most in the room were thugs who were giving him lip and he had to make sure we all knew he was boss. Lots of rules were given, NO cell phones, NO other reading materials, NO getting up except to use the bathroom ONCE and NO talking to your neighbors. I was smiling inside. I felt like this guy was a jailer.

Long story short some lady choked on her water about two hours in and got up to step out the back door because she was coughing so much. He chased her down with his finger pointed and said "Uhh.. unless you want to retake this class I suggest you step back inside NOW!" Everyone started looking around like, "you've got to be kidding!" After hashing the details about DUIs for about an hour (which is so applicable to me)we had break at about 7:00pm. Many went out for a smoke and I got the only thing I could out of the vending maching, Rootbeer and fishy crackers. It was a treat.

We resumed 10 minutes and not a second later, and soon heard a huge monsoon rolling outside. Before we knew it rain, wind and hail were coming like crazy! A tree had uprooted outside the door, water was coming in through the doorways, and the power went out! But we weren't to move. "If anybody chooses to leave this building they are looking at paying another fee and taking this class all over again!" The man was nuts!

We sat in the pitch black, 100 degree weather, parking lot flooding as we went, and learned about tailgating, HOV lanes and checking tire pressure. Classic. I couldn't believe what I was sitting through. The best part was that everyone started pulling out their cell phones to text or use the light and our instructor was clueless. At one point he saw a guy with his phone and said "oh, now don't think that just because the lights are out you can start using your phones again!" We all looked around like, "is this a joke?! Everybody is using them!" I guess he thought we all happened to have flashlights on us!

When we left at 9:20 (he let us out ten minutes early) I felt like I had tasted a prison for the first time: Treated like a number who was doing time for a crime I shouldn't have committed. 55 in a 45. I wish I could tell you that I won't be doing that again...